It’s 2:21 pm
A cold windy day here in SE Michigan. Its sunny but its not warm. Alive but not living. Was being entertained late last night by my friend Kerri who was on the warpath about having anyone talking about The Walking Dead season finale. Because we folks here on the East Coast see everything 3 hours earlier,we tend to pop off about the shows before anyone out West can see for themselves. And if you own a TV and have a favorite show,that can be a big problem.
Kerri was on her FB warning she would unfriend ANYONE who revealed anything about the show last night,since I have no cable,I had no problem keeping quiet….well that and Kerri having UPS on speed dial….but sitting here thinking about it,I think those days of fearing Willow may be gone now that I have a full grown CHEETAH in the house!
The reason for such an inside story is thus. I had a work function last night,we had a two hour meeting which I have blogged about before. We employees get a pep talk,a dinner or breakfast and we used to do classes. Now we play games and make small talk. This happens twice a year at the job. Well yesterdays meeting was the first for our new manager and he decided to switch things up,he invited everyone to bring their families to the meeting and he started it a hour early so folks could bring their kids and get home early.
It was a great idea and a lot of folks did bring their families out. A lot laughter,kids playing games,couples talking among themselves…
I fucking hated it.
I hated it the second I walked inside…..I had to be there because its a mandatory meeting,I had no choice. To be honest,I had no idea how I would feel so I didn’t voice any concerns,I decided I would test the waters out in a large social gathering….and I am not even close to being able to handle that. I sat on a stool and just watched….our manager gave a nice speech,handed out some awards and after a hour,they let us leave if we wanted too. I think I was the second person out the door.
It was extremely painful to see something I once had,we liked having company and being invited out. We hosted parties for Lori’s co-workers at Parisian and Lane Bryant. I had my buddy Farm over for countless Yu-Gi-oh duels…plus various other friends Lori had known. We had orphan dinners at the holidays and traveled to her family’s outings as well. You know,things that couples do together.
It’s weird,I have zero problem in a one on one setting….hanging with my friend Sue is great,I have noticed she and I have gone to places I haven’t been to since Lori has passed. Those bring out emotions but I can handle them much better with just one person. I am able to (somewhat) process what I am feeling in a private setting so much more then a large one. I guess that is why I haven’t been able to have a proper memorial yet. Its not that I don’t want to but I just can’t handle it yet. When will that change? I have no clue. I wish I did and I do take comfort in knowing that I am not the only one in this place.
The show that Kerri was watching is called The Walking Dead,its set in the near future of America where a zombie outbreak has laid waste to about 99.1 % of the world’s population. I guess its a huge hit,I have only seen the pilot episode. But I think I can relate to the zombies far better then a survivor. I feel like The Walking Dead every day. I get up,go to work and come home. I entertain the cheetah,he curls on my chest and we watch a movie most nights.
This week is a little different,I am donating blood on Good Easter at St. Thomas a Beckett. Its been a while since I have done so,the last time I couldn’t because my iron was too low from drinking green tea. I have avoided green tea and am taking vitamins so I should be good to go once again.
And with the weather warming up,I am hoping our volunteer captain (and 3 Musketeer) Justin at work will rustle up a few volunteer projects for us at work. Been trying to find a steady volunteer spot for a while now….I think the routine would be nice.
May have gotten a lead on a good window company so I can get my back kitchen window replaced or repaired,also going to have him check for leaks as well….I rather not have to suffer another winter like the one we just had in terms of being so cold.
Heading out for now,will write more later.